It’s rare for me to be at such a loss for words. When something wonderful is happening the words often spill out of me, when something horrible is happening they come even easier, part of why I love the first two lines of Detroit Annie, Hitchhiking so much, because I identify with them: Her words pour out as if her throat were a broken / artery and her mind were cut-glass, carelessly handled.
I don’t write eloquently, but I write from my heart, I spill my mind and blood onto the page because I am unable to do anything else, because that is what I need to do in order to figure out what is going on in my brain, and because it’s necessary. However, there has been so much going on the last few weeks that I am having a difficult time starting. I’m at a loss for words.
I feel I should start at the beginning, but I think I will start anywhere and just let that broken artery spill freely onto my blog again, or maybe write up the posts in whatever order they arrive and then publish them in the correct order: Sex 2.0, meeting Marla, leaving Marla, what has happened since I’ve been home.
There is just so much to write and I’m not sure how to just do it. But I’ll do it, because I need to get it out of me.
Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #28? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #30? Submit it here before Sunday May 25th at 11:59pm PDT. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.
Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.
To find the kind of inventor who cares enough to think things through, you need to look past the mainstream. Leave the well-trod paths behind, and explore the odd little shops where the master artisans do their work.
The Five-Contact Spark Plug is that kind of masterpiece.
Rupert Huse, who designed the Spark Plug, was clearly thinking about female anatomy and erotic response.
Editor’s Note: I’m fascinated with Electrosex and both this review and Themistokles’ other review this week deals directly with it, not only does this review give great information about the toy at hand it also talks about other similar items from other companies by comparison and is generally well written and enticing. Loved it!
Unless you’ve been living under a rock, or this is the first post you’ve ever seen of mine and you don’t follow me on twitter, you probably know that last weekend after Sex 2.0 my long-distance love Marla and I met face-to-face for the first time.
She picked me up at the hotel in Silver Springs, MD where Sex 2.0 was held at and we quickly sped to our hotel in Alexandria, VA (both right outside of Washington, D.C.). There will be much posting of our time together, and this will be the first of many HNT pictures that are posted from the weekend that is also posted on both of our blogs (we’re cheesy like that).
We both have lots of posts planned, if we can get to writing them, though a lot of the weekend is a blissful blur in my memory.
Here we are in our non-makeup’d post-sexing glory. We are happy, tired, blissful, and so many other adjectives. Onyx currently has this image of us as his desktop wallpaper.
Stay tuned for more posts and HNT’s of our wonderful weekend together!
Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #27? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #29? Submit it here before Sunday May 18th at 11:59pm PDT. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.
Editor’s Note: Apologies this edition came out later than expected/desired! I was out of town in the beginning of the week with a dead laptop and didn’t have a chance to get to it until later than I liked. This round-up only has reviews submitted by May 10th at 11:59pm PDT in it, as if it was posted on Monday.
Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.
So what did it actually taste like exactly? Rancid eggnog mixed with broccoli water, pineapples, and garnished with a little nutmeg and a final hint (just a hint) of celery. It smells great. It smells like gingerbread cookies coated in cinnamon, it’s even a nice light brown color but do not be fooled! Once you actually mix this in water it turns green and has a taste not many people could stomach.
Editor’s Note: I think I love well-written humorous negative reviews, and this is definitely one of those. I couldn’t help laughing out loud at a few points, and while it doesn’t make me want to buy the product for any male I know it makes me want to read more of Average Joe’s reviews. Don’t you agree?
Currently updating from “History of Written Erotica on the Internet” (third session) by Jack Stratton. I woke up later than planned after a long night last night, but that’s something else to talk about entirely. Basically I woke up when the keynote was happening and was going to get food during the first session although I just ended up missing it.
I went to Mollena‘s “Flying Your Freak Flag” session (second session) which was pretty amazing and hilarious (she wrote about it and Sex 2.0 here), and I have been tweeting massively regarding what has been going on this weekend.
There are two more sessions, and I’ll be live-tweeting throughout, but I wanted to post on here with a little update. Sex 2.0 has simply been wonderful and amazing thus far. I’ve met some brilliant and wonderful people and connected offline with people I’ve already connected to online, such as Carnivalesq, it’s pretty fantastic.
This session has focused on anonymity in addition to erotica itself, but specifically writing erotica and sex blogging and such. It’s something I definitely want to write about, my sort-of anonymity, as I go by Scarlet offline as well as on.
Also, while I am loving Sex 2.0 what I’m really excited about is that Marla is currently on her way driving up here to D.C. We have a hotel room for the next two nights, and are going to be fucking our brains out meeting, connecting, and… well… okay, fucking our brains out!
There will be so much more for me to write about, the last few days in NYC, the sex bus, Sex 2.0, meeting and fucking Marla, then back to NYC… I’m going to be a very busy blogger in the next week!
My reviewing structure, as outlined in this post is that I post full reviews on my review site Wanton Lotus (RSS) and teaser reviews once a week here. I posting reviews on Wanton Lotus Tues-Weds-Thurs or some combination thereof depending on the amount of reviews I have each week. Here is the round-up of my reviews for the week!
Material: SuperSkin (phthalate-free, latex-free) – said cyberskin in the video which isn’t accurate!
Length of the underside (balls to tip): 3-1/2″ (mini) 5 3/4″ (medium) Length of the topside (base to tip): 4″ (mini) 8 1/2″ (medium) – when hanging with gravity Girth: 4″ (mini) 4 1/2″ (medium)
Rating: 4 Lotus’ (out of 5) – Very Good & Highly Recommended
Varnish: “Each dildo is finished with at least five coats of Salad Bowl Finish, a food-quality varnish. The finish seals the wood, making them safe, waterproof, and natural-feeling. I never use any dyes or stains, and I’ve never heard of any allergic reactions.” – from the FAQ.
Length: 6 1/4 inches Width: 1 3/5 inches
Rating: 4 Lotus’ (out of 5) – Very Good & Highly Recommended!
Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #26? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #28? Submit it here before Sunday May 11th at 11:59pm PST. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.
Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.
I may be a submissive, but I’m not into pain, so comfort was very high on my list of requirements. I went to many of the sex toy sites and their collars just didn’t seem to cut it, they looked flimsy and uncomfortable.
I admit I’m biased because I lust after everything Sinvention makes, but I thought the review was wonderfully written and really pulled me in, then I found out this was her first review which surprised me (maybe because my first many reviews were crap), and I knew I had to choose her this week!
I could make a model of his cock, it would be fun, and I wouldn’t be using it to fuck boys or girls with (since candles make very poor dildos. I know from experience. Don’t ask.)
I always love Wendy’s reviews and this is a particularly wonderful and hilarious one. Her stories are always delightful, and even though the kit was full of fail the post is full of win. Definitely worth a read!
Tonight was the first night we allowed “I love you” to pass between our lips, although we have been feeling it for quite some time.
Marla had been hesitant to be sexual with us via the phone for fear of being left out in some way, simply because we are physically together and she wouldn’t be. She decided it would be easiest to break this barrier by calling and leaving us a voicemail.
We had mentioned it casually before, but this morning she teased us with the idea of calling and leaving a voicemail later this evening. I offered to return in kind: leave two sexy voicemails for her, one of me coming and one of Onyx coming. This was going to be a great evening experienced by all, we thought.
So, she called and left an amazingly sexy voicemail this evening, only a few minutes later after we sang her praises she asked if we would like to join her on the phone. Eagerly we did, and we all got off together, listening to each other moan as we all came. It was glorious.
For a long while after we all came we just idly chatted until she needed to get ready for bed, it was 2:30 her time after all. Onyx and I were working on cooling down from the amazing phone call and we were all texting each other when we decided that enough was enough. We were going to wait until meeting face-to-face to say those three little words, but it was time to say them since we all had been thinking them for quite some time.
We called her, and we all professed our love over and over, grinning from ear-to-ear, and so overcome with love and bliss that we were all almost crying. After waiting it was finally the perfect time to say it, after a most amazing week of growth and getting closer every day.
It’s an amazing feeling to love and be loved by two outstanding people. I love them. They love me. We all love each other. These are the best feelings I’ve ever felt.
The wonderful luna from BDSM is Love has given me a Sexy Blogger Award (award image below) and had this to say about me:
She makes me proud to be a woman of size. Her thoughts and passions have me transfixed.
I can’t explain how happy reading just that little blurb made me, especially the first sentence. I was both touched and flattered by her sentiment.
Her reasoning behind choosing me is definitely worth more to me than the “award” given in the meme. I’m not huge on awards in general, but I think they can be fun and a great way to give kudos to others and generally highlight others and bring more attention to them, which is great. This meme seems to be going around the blog circles I fit in, and it’s always wonderful to be included.
According to luna there are two rules to receiving this:
“You are to list 5 sexy things about yourself and pass it on to 4 other people.”
I’m not going to deny the opportunity to pass on some nice sentiment to others, and it’s always fun to receive something like this from someone unexpected so here we go. I’m having a very difficult time with the five sexy things, I’m really not that into bragging about myself and that’s what this feels like, but, here we go…
Five sexy things
Despite the fact that society tells me I shouldn’t be sexy as a woman of considerable girth, I don’t let that stop me from expressing and enjoying my sexuality. This is what made me so elated when part of luna’s reason for choosing me for this was because: “She makes me proud to be a woman of size.” I’ll admit it’s not always easy to be sexually confident in general let alone when society says that you’re not supposed to for various reasons (not just limited to large women, of course), and to know that I make someone, anyone, feel a little better about themselves is incredible.
I’m open and honest about who I am for the most part. Despite the amount I spill my soul on here I am somewhat guarded about sharing deep feelings or ideas I have to others I don’t know very well, however, I don’t let that guardedness keep me from being as authentically me as I possibly can: a sexual deviant who is open about and comfortable with what she does, and doesn’t try to pretend to be something or someone else. I think that’s sexy, anyway.
While body mods are all the rage these days I really do think that my eight tattoos and thirty-some-odd piercings really do enhance my body, not only by calling attention to some of the sexiest parts of myself but also because the tattoos and piercings themselves are sexy (or so I like to think). I put a lot of thought and detail to every one of them, and think they also show my comfortability with my body which is also sexy.
My brain is the sexiest part of me, or so it likes to think (har har). I may overanalyze most times, but I also think that people are more attracted to my intellect than anything else about me (not to say people aren’t attracted to other parts of me too, but I think the brain is the best part of the package).
My partners: they are both so sexy that I must be sexy too, right? They inspire me and encourage me to be confident in my sexuality, and they fill my heart with such joy it radiates from me which I think is sexy.
My four sexy bloggers
There are SO many sexy bloggers out there it’s not even right to only choose four, but the ones below are the first ones that popped into my head, and a few of the other ones I’d choose have already been awarded this from others. If I had my way I would give one to everyone in the “friends & lovers” section of my links, and probably others that I’ve forgotten to include there as well. The problem with picking just four is there are so many other people left out, but, I’m sticking to the rules of the meme, otherwise it would take me forever to list everyone!
Gabe and Elizabeth – They blog over on Pornocracy and put an extremely sexy video out recently. I feel that may of our values and ideas are very similar, which endears me to them automatically, and in addition to that they are highly sexy individuals and overwhelmingly sexy as a pair! Not sure if I should count them as one or two, but since it’s a sexy blogger award vs. sexy blog award I think they count as two.
Amber – of Divergent Dance. Another person I feel I have similar ideas with, she is a tomboy femme among other similarities, and I have come to think of her friendship quite fondly. I think she and her writing are both super sexy and am always excited when she has a new post for me to read to get another slice of her life, gender, love, or sexuality.
Marla – Last but certainly not least there’s no way I could leave my long-distance love out of this, for she is incredibly sexy and blogs over at Confessions of Promiscuity. There is no question that I find her extremely sexy, she fits in with Onyx and I so perfectly and just everything about her makes me want to ravage her and make her come over and over until she begs for me to stop… but I digress. She just posted her first piece of erotica inspired by yours truly, so you can read how amazingly sexy she and her ideas are!
There have been so many things happening in the last week that I don’t really know where to start, but let’s see…
I’ll start with pointing you to the last few posts I did on this subject. Overflow about a week ago Thursday when I was overcome with emotion and broke down, unable to really talk about what was going on, but analyzed it afterward. This occurrence and post kind of kick-started the last week of communication and growth between Marla, Onyx, and myself. It has been both incredibly difficult and amazingly wonderful, often at the same time.
In between and since all of these posts we’ve all talked, many a time. Marla wrote about the last few days today in a post titled Emotional Hangover which is wonderful and a much shorter recounting of the happenings than I will probably give, just because I can’t stop myself, so if you don’t want to read all my babble you can go over and read her post to get a good impression of the happenings. Or you can go read her post to get her perspective on things too.
There has been so much going on since Sunday, or really since last Thursday, that I don’t think I can go into too much detail because there has just been way too much. We all have insecurities, some of them very similar and some of them vastly different, but they are there nonetheless. The good part is that we have all grown so much more comfortable with each other in the last week especially so we are really able to say things when something happens that upsets us rather than bottling it up. None of us are really able to say something right away, but usually soon after.
Anytime anyone has something that hurt them or that they are insecure about, fearful of, worried about, etc. we all try to talk together about whatever is going on and emphasize that these feelings are not bad to have or to feel. One thing we all struggle with is getting away from the tendency to bottle everything up or say “this is just my issue they don’t need to know,” though I feel like all of us are much more open and able to allow ourselves to express these things to the others due to the experiences in the last few weeks.
I feel like the three of us have gotten better at communication in general over the last week, and we’ve all gotten so much more comfortable expressing things to each other, both of which are vital for our triad to move forward in any real way. It’s so amazingly exciting, and we’ve gotten to a place of joy and love which has it’s ups and downs but the ups make the downs far worth it.
We all have a tendency to wait for the other shoe to drop, expect something bad to happen, overanalyze, and worry. Of course, we’re human with emotions and are capable of vast emotional switches, but it seems like every day for the last week has just been endless really high highs and really low lows, which has both brought us closer and taken a bit of a toll. Luckily the toll isn’t that bad, just annoying usually emotional hangovers.
We’ve each at some point freaked out over something or another, all valid emotional complaints, but all things we have been able to talk about and work through together, which has been amazing.
I’m still not completely secure in Onyx and Marla relating sexually, but the more Marla and I get comfortable being sexual the more I will be okay with that, I think. Marla and my sexual relationship has moved forward in the past week, as well, we have talked about or worries with the other and become more sexual. On the flip side, Onyx and Marla have gotten much more emotionally connected in the last week and they have progressed greatly there.
Even though I’m getting more comfortable with their sexual relationship I’m still extremely insecure about their relating on a D/s level which I find interesting. Onyx brought something up last night that made it make more sense, basically that he has less to be threatened about in some ways due to the gender of our relationship as well as the power within it.
By definition my relationship with her is going to be different, though there will be many similarities because she and I are both female our relationship will be rather different than my relationship with onyx. I also will probably primarily be topping her, and I’m primarily submissive with Onyx, so that is quite different as well.
However, their relationship is going to be more similar to his and mine than I have really prepared myself for, not only because it is a male/female relationship like mine and Onyx’s but also because primarily he will be the Top and she the bottom, as he doesn’t really switch all that much though occasionally.
I just see that as being a little too close for comfort sometimes, especially since I am rather insecure about my abilities as a submissive/bottom. I assume that she will be better than I at this, and I assume that he will have an easier time topping her because he has often had a difficult time topping me. I think I will be very envious of this once they start getting even more sexual and start exploring bdsm and power with one another.
In addition, Onyx and I have been talking about me having another partner for quite some time. It started with Kat and we’ve been talking about it ever since, so he’s had a year to prepare sharing me with someone else. He and I have never before explored me sharing him with another person, so I was not prepared for it at all and not used to the idea at all either. It’s been a real shock, actually, how much I’ve not been prepared for it.
I know this will continue to be an issue for me, but it’s one that they are both aware of and we are all working to understand and help me feel better about. This does not mean they are going to not be sexual, but it does mean they will understand if I get upset and need to talk about something. It also doesn’t mean that I’m not extremely happy that they are getting closer both sexually and emotionally, because I really am.
One of the biggest problems we have now that we’ve worked through so much stuff over the last week, is that Marla is so far away and we are all unable to physically be together. She and I are planning on meeting May 10th in Washington D.C., though that’s still a little up in the air if it will actually happen we’re planning that it will because it almost has to at this point. Then we are planning on bringing her up here to Seattle at the end of June for all three of us to be together.
The situation we have now is really not fair to her at all. Onyx and I are able to physically be together, be sexual without her, and she has felt very left out of that. We all talked last night about this, and tried to emphasize that she is welcome and invited, but even the idea of being on the phone while we are fucking was a little too much for her. I suggested some alternate methods of communication and inclusion, but we are still working on what might be best. I think once we meet it will be easier and more difficult for her.
Anyone want to move her up here now so that we can all be together? Pretty please?
And, here are some of the songs I’ve been listening to quite a lot lately. Perfect Fingers is not actually by Ani it’s by Tami Greer. The Landon Pigg song is one that Marla introduced me to. The other songs are just wonderful sappy love songs.
