Purveyor of Pleasure

Delving into my humanity and the joys and pitfalls of an overanalytical nature.

Impromptu Ravishment Play

Please note: this post will contain talk of ravishment/rape play and is not meant to be a trigger for anyone who may have suffered from sexual assault. This post or participation in this activity does not condone any sort of non-consensual sexual activity.

As Tart said, “Do I want actual rape? Good lord no!” And I completely agree. I can’t express my feelings of horror when I think that people actually think it is acceptable to have sex with someone completely against their will, and yet I find consensual play incredibly arousing. Playing with vulnerability and putting myself in seemingly vulnerable situations is one of the strongest lures I have to BDSM in general, and is my pull to rape play.

There is something powerful in consensually giving oneself to another, something I’ve talked about numerous times before. Willfully putting oneself in the power of another to create the illusion of helplessness while still having some measure of control is all power play is about. Rape play is another form of power play, obviously, as most rape is about power, not about sex. Being able to pretend to struggle, to be “overpowered” and “forced” into submission is something which appeals to my force fetish and allows an outlet for my strong-willed and stubborn nature while also being in the context of Master’s and my relationship.

As said before: do I want to be raped? Do I want to be taken against my will? Of course not! I would even say: hell no! However, rape play is about the blending of one person’s will to struggle and be overpowered and the other’s will to overpower. It’s about mutual fantasies being fulfilled, and fully consensual and safe, even if it may not always completely feel like it in the moment.

That said, on to the scenario.

Master and I were lying in bed, talking, teasing each other. He moved on top of me and grabbed my wrists as he often does, I struggled a little more than usual, and he became more forceful. As he became more forceful I began to struggle even more, saying “no” and “stop” and trying (not too hard) to get out of his grasp. He told me what he was going to do to me, he slid a finger inside me and told me how wet I was, that I wanted it, and I disagreed.

He began fucking me hard, wonderfully, and he continued teasing me about my desire, which I constantly refused to admit until he slowed down and then took his cock out of me. I whimpered and refused to admit it for a few moments before giving in, furthering the scenario by admitting to be a horny slut, begging to be fucked, begging to be used, begging for his cum.

The few force scenes that we’ve done have ended that way. It’s a long-time fantasy of mine, being discovered as a slut, being called out on it even if I’m pretending to resist. It is something Master loves as well, he’s the one who always turns it to that aspect of it. “Non-consent” erotic stories (or, consensual non-consent scenarios) were what lead me to BDSM in the first place.

These are desires that, when I look into the origin of them, don’t make much logical sense. But, then, what desires really do? The desire to be out of control for me (a control freak) is a big mixture of scary, exciting, and arousing. The same can be said for vulnerability. One of the nice things about rape play is that it allows me to be scared in a way that regular play does not. I can work with feeling scared and vulnerable in a space where I can let those emotions out while still knowing that I am safe and cared for (despite the appearance of otherwise from an unknowing outside observer).

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6 Comments

  1. This is a very sexy description of an NC fantasy. I have never been brave enough to write about my personal play along these line but I think you described the idea and motivation brilliantly.

  2. Thank you, that means a lot coming from someone who is bored with most sex blogs. ;) Seriously, though, I always have trouble trying to rationalize and put into words the desire for NC play, and I’m glad it came off so well as to warrant such a compliment!

  3. This type of play is so powerful and I love how you share yourself here in expressing this desire and sharing this fantasy that became a beautiful reality.

    Honey

  4. Miss Honey-
    Thank you very much! It’s always a struggle to write about something which is both controversial and often conflicting within my own self. I’m glad it translates to others as well!

  5. Ben

    This was a good post. I have been struggling with how take advantage of my girlfriend in this way without feeling like the worst kind of sleazebag. The more I hear accounts like this online, the better I feel about it.

    However, I have a (rather long) piece of constructive criticism. Recent work in biological anthropology is starting to show that most rapes (ie significantly more than 50%)seem to be motivated predominantly by evolutionarily-successful reproductive strategies (from the male’s perspective), and not a desire from the male to establish power/dominance.

    Most of the lines of evidence that are leading evolutionary biologists to support this viewpoint consist of the relative ease with which evolutionary theory (as compared to the “rape=power” meme) can explain puzzling trends in studies done on rape.

    To me, the most fascinating “discovery” is that married women who are raped violently (ie leaving bruises, scars/any sign of struggle etc.) suffer less psychological trauma than those who survived their experiences with relatively less physical marks. Evolutionary theory can explain this variation in the wife’s psychological trauma as inversely reflecting the husband’s degree of certainty that the intercourse was not consensual. In other words, assuming she is otherwise satisfied in the marriage and wishes to keep her husband, the woman wants her spouse to feel confident that her children are in fact his (paternity certainty being one of the main evolutionary variables that monogamous males seek to maximize since expending parental effort on unrelated offspring represents one of the least successful evolutionary strategies [providing for the current children of a new spouse being the major exception]).

    If you can’t tell already, I study things that make me anxious.

    Anyway, thanks for the contribution to my understanding of what women can enjoy. As for you, I suspect that viewing rape as sex-motivated could potentially help you untangle why it turns you on.

  6. @Ben: Hmm, interesting ideas, but I would be very interested in seeing the studies which this new data are coming from and not only how motivation is being recorded but also who this work is being done with, how the questions are asked, the rapists in question, etc. It’s not that I don’t think that it is possible that over 50% of rapes are more sexually motivated than power motivated, I’m sure that could be true, but as someone who has read many studies I also know how data can be skewed.

    Further, even if rape is primarily sexually motivated there is no way to pull power completely out of rape or even to pull power out of sex, as it is laced within everything we do. Just because a primary (conscious?) motivation might be sex that doesn’t mean that power isn’t another factor. As I said, I can believe that sex can be a powerful motivation for rape, and I believe that it is often the motivation, but is it the underlying cause or reason for rape, or is it just a conscious motivation? Can we say that rape is not about power, even if it is not the primary motivation?

    And, actually, viewing rape as power-motivated has helped me untangle why it turns me on. As I mentioned I am a control freak, and that is at the basis of a lot of my desire for rape play. Viewing rape as sex-motivated is also understandable, but I think that would actually make me understand it less if I were to view it as only sex-motivated rather than a combination.

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