I recently have begun looking into phone sex operator (PSO) work, and with the guidance of the wonderful Ellie Lumpesse I have applied at a few places, and ended up getting a couple offers, one of which I have accepted. Master just faxed in my contract to them today, and so I’m hoping to start work tomorrow. I’m both excited and nervous for this new and very different opportunity! I have chosen to get into this type of sex work for a few reasons.
In looking for a new job, as I have been for the last few months, I have come to the realization that in order to make the kind of money I would like here (in Utah, as that is the tricky part) I would have to change my appearance and personality, basically I would have to hide myself. Now, that is not to say I wouldn’t have to do the same things doing PSO work, obviously there can be quite a bit of roleplay involved, but it is a much different type of roleplay.
I have worked and continue to work a lot on my appearance and personality. I am constantly learning about myself, my desires, my likes and dislikes, and all sorts of factors which go into what I consider to make up this entity which is me. I have done a lot of exploring via this blog, and other blogs, and just in my head. I have come into my own in a very distinct way, and I really to believe that I am constantly learning and changing.
However, I also believe that just about any place I would find acceptable to work here in Utah, with a few exceptions (though none which are hiring), would also not allow me to be me, I would have to pretend to be conservative, straight-laced, and professional, as well as dye my hair, cover my tattoos, and wear clothing I wouldn’t wear otherwise. This isn’t necessarily bad, and I’ve done this before for most jobs which I’ve had, but I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want to do with my life, what goals I have, what I see myself doing down the road, and basically I do not want to be schizophrenic. What I mean by that is, I don’t want to have to be a different person at work than I am at home.
With PSO work I may have to be a different person than I am, engage in some roleplay, something like that, but I would always be me, because the roleplay has a much different purpose. I will be able to help others explore their own (often hidden) fantasies, while exploring my own sexuality as well. In some ways it’s a lot like sex therapy for both myself and the client, both of us being able to act out a fantasy that might not be accessible otherwise. I imagine this will be a highly rewarding for someone who enjoys finding and exploring the sexuality of others as well as my own sexuality.
When I told a few friends of mine that I was getting into phone sex work, after asking about the money one of them said “well, if you’re going to degrade yourself, you might as well get paid well” or something similar. It was kind of glossed over in the conversation, as I think I was the only one who heard him say that, so the others went on to something else, but it made me think.
I really don’t view PSO work or any sex work as degrading when done for the right reasons. It can be degrading for some if done for various reasons or if forced into it, as some people are. However, I do believe that someone can actually choose to get into sex work and find joy, pleasure, and happiness in it. I also believe that it can be empowering, which is often thought of as the opposite of degrading. This is part of being sex-positive, in my mind.
I have yet to have my first day, as I said above, I have a briefing scheduled for tomorrow and hope to start shortly after that. I’ll no doubt report on how I feel about it post-first day, and if any of my feelings regarding PSO work or sex work change. I’m very interested to see how I grow from this experience, and I hope to find out new things about myself and about others due to this decision.