Purveyor of Pleasure

Delving into my humanity and the joys and pitfalls of an overanalytical nature.

Page 30 of 65

Marla: an Introduction

adipositivity220
Number 220 from The Adipositivity Project

As many of you may know, someone has featured in mine and Onyx’s life more prominently in the last few weeks than she has before. Remarkably, we met originally on IRC quite a while ago, and I’ve always thought she was interesting and someone I’d like to get to know.

Unbeknownst to either of us, she started following me on twitter because of finding this blog and not because of who she knew on IRC. Eventually we discovered who each other were on both mediums, and we’ve been in light contact ever since.

About a month and a half ago we started interacting on a more regular basis. Before that we talked occasionally but mostly in passing. It started with me guiding her toward some toy review programs, and then kinda blossomed from there.

We’ve been talking more over the course of the last few weeks. At some point she confessed to having a “little queer crush on” me. At some point we exchanged phone numbers and started texting back and forth in addition to DMing (on twitter). At some point we started talking about her coming here in June. And at some point (about eight days ago) we started talking on the phone every night.

She and Onyx have been getting to know each other too, not to downplay their involvement, though it hasn’t been quite as substantial. We are all definitely still in the “getting to know you while also crushing” phase.

We’re both taking it slow and rushing it at the same time, in some ways, which is strange, but it feels really right (sometimes scarily right). Onyx and I have been talking about bringing others in to our relationship or having other relationships for a while now, and now this seems like something that might actually occur.

There is plenty more to say on this subject, and there will be plenty more posts regarding the three of us, both what has happened in the last few weeks and what is still to come.

Microfantasy Monday – Flame

The idea behind Microfantasy Mondays comes from Ang of Sweltering Celt.

This week’s theme: Flame.

“Touch it.” She giggles, nervous, but I persist. “Touch it.”

I watch her as she looks into my eyes, sees the seriousness there, realizing I’m not just teasing her. As she reaches her hand out toward it her tongue darts out to moisten her bottom lip, teeth right after it, tugging at the soft skin that I am aching to touch.

She smiles and glides her fingers through the flame once, knowing that the middle of the teardrop-shaped heat will not burn her fingers, only slightly hesitant because of that. Each movement of her hand is graceful, it seems to float up and around in fluid motions. I envy her hands.

I grin as she bites her lip again, her nervousness all the more adorable. She was the one who asked, who had been curious about trying it since she saw me doing it at the last play party, who had mentioned to me that she would like to try it some time that same night. She had tried to be nonchalant when she suggested it, too, but I could see the places her facade had cracked, showing the nervous girl behind it.

She has already taken off her top, my hand gestures for her to lay down and again she moves like a dancer, lying on her back so that I can have access to her abs and belly to roll my hot stick across. I take my torch, steeped in alcohol, and bring it to the teardrop fire her fingers were so recently caressing. In a burst of light the flame is transferred and I hear her gasp.

Pleasurists #19


Image by GuilleDes used under a Creative Commons License

Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #18? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #20? Submit it here before Sunday March 15th at 11:59pm PST. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

On to the reviews…

Editor’s Pick

  • Pearl Cuffs by CarrieAnn
  • The second I saw them a fantasy bloomed, large and dark, in the recesses of my mind.

    I had images of formalwear and candlelight, gourmet meals and decadent desserts. A meal served silently, these dainty pearl cuffs binding my wrists. Images of kneeling at his feet, being hand fed bits of his meal and sips of his wine – the pearl cuffs wrapping my wrists, hands helplessly still in my lap.

Madame Editrix
Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

Read More

LELO Toy Giveaway on Pleasurists!


Image is a slightly modified version of the header on the LELO Vimeo Group

Cross-posted from Pleasurists

Everyone loves LELO toys. Usually I stay away from sweeping generalizations like that, but I really think this one is true. Especially since they expanded their line to include their homme line, now no one has a reason not to love them!

In this very exciting contest Pleasurists is teaming up with LELO to not only give away an elegant LELO pleasure object, but a LELO pleasure object of your choice!

How does this work, you might ask? Well, basically you would want to go look at the LELO line of products and choose one product to focus your submission on. You can choose any product as long as it’s not part of the Luxe line. Choose Bo or Bob from the Homme line or Elise, Ella, Gigi, Iris, Lily, Liv, Luna, Mia, or Nea from the Femme line. To see what others have thought of various LELO products to help you choose one you can visit the LELO section of our All Reviews page.

Once you’ve chosen your pleasure object (and only one, mind you) then the real fun begins. To win you must submit something featuring your pleasure object of choice. It could be an essay about what you long to do with Lily, a photoshopped image of 12 Bob’s hidden around an otherwise vanilla room, an erotic story featuring Elise as the star, basically the sky’s the limit! The only trick is that you must remain anonymous which makes things a little more difficult.

The entries are anonymous because once the contest ends the entries will be published on Pleasurists for everyone to read and judge. The submission with the most votes wins the featured toy! You cannot let anyone know which submission is your own, but you can encourage people to come and vote. If you make any reference to the contents or type of your submission before or after the voting request is published or hint at it in any way you will be disqualified.

Submission Requirements:

  • Email your submission to scarletsexgeek AT gmail.com by Friday April 10th at 11:59pm PST.
  • Remain anonymous in your submission. Nothing must be able to give away the fact that you are the creator.
  • Post a review of the product once you receive it, which would be featured on the next issue of Pleasurists.
  • You must be willing to give out your mailing address in order to win. The winning toy will be sent directly from LELO right to your door!

Official contest post on Pleasurists

Reviews: Black, Pink, and Silver

My new reviewing structure, as outlined in this post from two days ago is that I shall be posting full reviews on my review site Wanton Lotus (RSS) and teaser reviews once a week here. I will probably be posting reviews Tuesday and Thursday or Tues-Weds-Thurs if I have three reviews to do that week (though I wasn’t on that schedule this week since this is the first week I did it). I have decided Fridays will be my promotion day on here, so here is the first round-up of my reviews for the week!

Brando aka Realistic, Large Bent made by Vixen Creations

Dildo Profile

Name: Brando

Material: Silicone

Height: 7″
Thickness: 2″ or 6.5″ around

Pros: Thick, but not super thick. Perfect for amateur size queens. Wonderful vaginally. Also a secret suction cup dildo!
Cons: Might be too thick for some. Also is little daunting for anal play.

Get the full scoop: watch my Brando video review!


hotheart

Amazing Hot Heart Massager Review Snippit

Onyx and I both have back pain, which we often help each other with by massaging the other. His is generally located in his upper-back, while mine is in my lower-back, though sometimes we inadvertently swap symptoms through no design of our own. We sometimes even use the Hitachi as a back massager (unheard of, I know) to allieviate these symptoms. When I had the opportunity to receive the Amazing Hot Heart Massager I jumped at the chance. Anything that makes massaging easier for the massager or better for the massagee was something I definitely at least wanted to try.

Read the rest of my Amazing Hot Heart Massager review!


leatherhogtie

Leather Hogtie Review Snippit

When I found the Leather Hogtie with Scissor Snaps I imagined using them with my Axovus Wrist Cuffs and matching Ankle Cuffs. I imagined a great way to tie someone up and fuck them. I imagined that was what I would be doing with this hogtie strap, but I was wrong. It was completely my fault that I was wrong, but I was wrong.

First, a little of the hogtie device itself. It’s really a very basic restraint device. It’s an O-ring with four strips of leather attached that have scissor snaps attached to them, making it so you can attach the hogtie device to four other things. It’s intended to be attached to four cuffs: two wrist, two ankle, to produce the hogtie position.

Read the rest of my Leather Hogtie review!

The Best Laid Plans

smile if you like anal sex
Found at Romeo Tees (yes, it’s a shirt you can buy! I want one)

I love anal sex. I really don’t say that enough on here I think. I love giving it, receiving it, just about anything about it. Well, I don’t like when it’s messy, but I don’t get upset when it is because that’s part of it. Obviously when you’re playing with the backdoor there is always the possibility of shit, and while I’m not into that I just roll with it and always keep tissues handy. Wendy Blackheart actually has a wonderful post about shit and anal sex called shit happens on her awesome anal-sex oriented site Ask the Ass Bandit, but I digress.

Onyx feels much the same way as I do about anal sex. In a way it’s one of the things that brought us together, or at least was a big part of our relationship, as much of our online relationship was played out in an anal sex channel on irc.bondage.com. He’s actually quite an anal slut when the mood strikes, as I am. We both enjoy giving and receiving, which makes it that much more fun.

Despite both of us loving anal we don’t do it as often as we might want. It takes quite a bit of preparation and forethought, which we don’t usually have when we fuck. Usually it’s just an impulse when we do it and not planned out.

The last few nights we’ve been talking about me fucking his ass. Ever since I got Brando, really, we’ve been talking about it, though not talking about me fucking his ass with Brando because that prospect was a little too intimidating. Neither of us have the courage to take Brando anally yet, though I think it’ll happen sometime, but that’s another story.

Since we’d been talking about it for a while, last night while we were settling down to bed, Onyx brought it up again, and I told him to go get the required assistants, specifically one of my harnesses and whatever dildo he had a preference toward. He came back with Boy Butter, my Hardcore Harness, Bandito, Celestial Perfection, and Tantus G-Force Wand. The last one isn’t harness compatible, but is great for fucking with because of it’s extended handle.

I did a few things to clean up and then instructed him to get on the bed (futon). He knelt and then moved to all fours, moved a pillow under his chest to facilitate his position before letting his head fall to the bed, resting on his hands. As I watched I slipped the Celestial Perfection into my harness and then slipped the harness on. I wasn’t going to fuck his ass right away, I would first use my fingers to open him up, but I wanted to be ready to fuck when we got there.

My Rubber Whip was lying on the floor in front of him, so I instructed him to hand it to me. I lightly began slapping his ass with the whip, trailing the soft falls across his back, and lightly teasing his balls with the strands. He’s not big into pain, and though the whip can sting if used hard, I was being sure to be light, using the sensation play to heighten his excitement.

I lubed up his ass and my finger with the Boy Butter and began working it in and out, slowly and surely, as he moaned and writhed before me. I added a second finger, then a third, adding little bits of lube each time a new finger was inserted. I remarked on how much of an anal slut he was being, and occasionally stroked his cock or massaged his balls. Whenever he started to tense I made him squeeze his ass around my fingers and then release completely.

When I added a fourth finger he tensed and pulled forward so my fingers pulled out, letting me know that had hurt. I worked back up from one again and added more lube before adding the fourth finger, but was able to get all four in easily that time, and he liked it. He was pushing back against the fingers as I moved them in and out. I asked him how many fingers he thought I had in.

“Three?” He asked curiously.

“Nope. Four.”

“Wow.”

I grinned and moved them a little more intently in his ass, my other hand squirting a bit of the lube onto my cock as I did, getting ready to fuck him with the silicone that was now transformed into my pearly white cock.

I had already made sure the curve of the cock was going to be at the right angle to get at his prostate, so I started slowly inserting. He pulled forward suddenly, letting me know that it hurt for some reason. This also popped my cock out of my harness, which was annoying, the base is pretty thin and went right with him when he jerked his hips. I added more lube, tried again with the cock out of the harness, and again it hurt. We tried a third time, got farther in, but it just wasn’t working right.

We paused for a few moments and decided to try Bandito instead. I loosened the harness so I could slip Bandito in, during which time one of the straps came undone completely because I had pulled too hard (it has tighteners like the ones on backpacks to make the shoulder straps longer/shorter) and I had to take it off and lace it back the right way before putting it back on again.

While I was doing that, Onyx remarked that perhaps the position was the issue, and decided to move onto his back instead. I went and grabbed my sling which helps the bottom keep their legs in the air more easily so that he would be more comfortable in that position.

I again started with my fingers while stroking the lube into my Bandito with my other hand, getting him back to the point of being open for my cock before going to insert it. It hurt again. We decided that maybe he hadn’t cleared his backdoor completely, though he had gone before we started to try and avoid this problem, so he went into the bathroom to do this.

He came out a bit later, claiming something wasn’t quite right, and we should maybe wait for another time. I’ve had the same experience before, having anal be unexpectedly painful and just not feel right, so I understood. We cleaned up, snuggled a bit, and ended the night with me getting fucked doggy style instead, though not in the ass.

Even when you’re thoughtful and ready for anal, sometimes it just doesn’t work for whatever reason. We will try again, though, soon, and next time it’ll work. Or so we hope.

Toy Reviewing Changes

I heart sex toys
Made by me.

Taking a tip from Bad Bad Girl I’m actually going to be changing around the way I do toy reviews on this blog.

Not too long ago I acquired WantonLotus.com and cross-posted all my reviews there. In the last few Pleasurists I have been linking to reviews on Wanton Lotus as opposed to here, kind of slowly transitioning my reviews from here to there, in a way. Now I have decided to do more than that.

While I will post on here with reviewed toys once a week it will be a brief summary of the toys I have reviewed, no more than three a week and probably more like two. I will list some of the basic elements of the toy and a link to the toy site but leave it to you to decide if you would like to go over to Wanton Lotus and read the entire review. I know many people will, just as I do this with Bad Bad Girl on her BBG Toys site.

Basically doing this will enable me to post multiple reviews on that site, possibly scheduling them to come out Mon-Wed-Fri or Tues-Wed-Thurs or something like that and not worry about having this site taken over by toy reviews.

Though I have been thinking about doing this for quite a while, as I have had Wanton Lotus for quite some time and that was part of the idea for getting the site, the catalyst for this was my post on Sex Toys and Sex Blogs. Like I said on there:

While I enjoy reading reviews and I do review a lot of toys I have always done it one of two ways. First, I started reviewing one toy a week. Easy, simple, one toy a week, with posts in between. Then, when I started to get more companies I was reviewing for, I moved that to two reviews a week (rarely, but sometimes three), but I had to have at least four posts between them. Why four posts? Well… I don’t really know. But that’s what I set for myself. I thought it was a good number, and I’ve had a lot to write about lately. Sometimes that number didn’t happen, sometimes it was two, sometimes it was six, etc. but, that was the goal. I’ve always made sure to have other content along side my reviews.

But now this method isn’t working for me, mostly because I’ve had writers block lately and have been unable to sit down and write the way I want and need to. I’ve also been busy exploring a new city and looking for a job, so I haven’t been writing as much even when I can write.

I also have more and more products that I want to review. Not just toys that are sent to me, though those are definitely a big part of it, but also books I read and older toys that I have. I have this desire to have a somewhat comprehensive idea of what is in my toybox represented by my reviews. I want to re-write some of my older reviews to be better and more comprehensive.

In addition to toy-specific posts I also want to start writing some Toy Info 101 posts as well, such as Material Safety, How to Choose a Toy, Floggers 101, Harnesses 101, etc. I know there are other sites who have articles like this, but these would be mine. I also want to write non toy-oriented ones for this site, but that’s a whole different topic.

Why do I want to do all this? Because I think reviews are important. I enjoy reading reviews and think that others enjoy reading them too. I think that they’re helpful for people who buy toys to get a good idea of products. Sure, there are lots of toy reviews saturating the sex blogging world right now, but I have a passion for toys, and I’m happy to exploit the opportunity to test out more toys, learn about toys, and share that knowledge with others.

Interaction


From someecards.

I tend to live in my head more than anywhere else, which can make it difficult to meet new people. I obsess over making good impressions so I often don’t say much when meeting someone for the first time and end up coming off either as shy or disinterested (and I think the latter more than the former). I generally prefer to observe others before engaging in conversation with them, as well, which doesn’t help.

The point being, I’m kind of terrible at meeting new people, and I’m kind of terrible at communication in general, I think. Writing is the way I communicate best, and I believe in communication with friends and lovers. I believe that it’s important, but sometimes it’s so damn difficult for me to get anything out.

This post was originally going to be about flirting, or my inability to flirt, but instead it’s evolved into interaction and communication in general, though also about flirting.

I think both my lack of flirting and communication abilities both stem from the same place: I’m afraid of my words being taken the wrong way, and sometimes I’m afraid of my words being taken the right way and my advances or assertions being unwanted or incorrect.

Everyone has these fears to an extent, but some have them more than others. I always admire the people who can speak their mind and who seem to have little disregard for what others think of them. I’m not that person, although I often wish I was. I care too much about what people think of me, and it pains me when someone dislikes me for whatever reason.

I came out as queer at a young age. I was the founder and president of my high school’s GSA and very out. I watched straight or even bi female friends of mine flirt with other girls, snuggle with them, kiss them, all the while wishing I could experience that but holding myself at arms length in fear of what they would think of me. I desired closeness in a friendly way, without any sexual overtones, just snuggling and exploration, but I was afraid if I attempted to join in they would think I was hitting on them.

It made me guarded, careful of what I said, worried at every turn that someone would take something I said the wrong way. I collapsed into myself and didn’t share that connection with anyone around me. I didn’t know many queer girls, and the ones I did had boyfriends or just generally weren’t interested, so that wasn’t something I could explore with them either.

The point of all this is I don’t think I know how to interact with others in a good way, and more and more I choose not to interact and to crawl deeper and deeper into my own fears and frustrations. The problem really is that I don’t know how to get out of it, and further that I’m afraid to try to get out of it because that could mean ruin.

Often, too, if I get close to someone I sabotage it by overanalyzing and becoming anxious about the interactions. I cherish some of the friendships I’ve made online, but they all seem temporary, and I know that’s mostly my fault.

I love Onyx but we are not enough for each other, we both need other friends and lovers to be in our lives. We’ve gone out and met people here, but nowhere near as much as we should have by now. Every time we go somewhere it’s a struggle because I push against it, even though I know that once we go out I will enjoy myself. I can’t seem to help my automatic aversion to the outside world.

It’s ironic, maybe, that the things I want the most–simple interaction, closeness, friends–are maybe the most difficult things for me to allow myself to get.

Pleasurists #18


Image by Don Julian

Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #17? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #19? Submit it here before Sunday March 8th at 11:59pm PST. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

On to the reviews…

Editor’s Pick

  • Bill and Desiree: Love Is Timeless by Domina Doll on Viviane’s Sex Carnival
  • Everything they do, they do with exhilaration and wild abandon. They explore their sexual love like children who are delighted and amazed by everything they see and touch. I had a perma-smile welded on my face as I watched them make love with such tenderness: their smiles, laughter and joy radiating out of the screen to affect me as well. It was so powerful and beautifully poignant to watch their sweet ecstatic moans and tearful orgasms as they convulsed with ecstasy.

Madame Editrix
Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

Read More

Review: Aneros Peridise

The Aneros Peridise and I have had a strange relationship. I was enamored with them the first time I laid eyes on them on Babeland’s website. Generally I love unusual toys, and Peridise is definitely unusual.

Aside from the uniqueness of the toy, my relationship to it actually has to do with the issues I’ve had regarding reviewing it. I received my Peridise at the same time I got the Bliss #12 and Entice lube, which was near the end of November. I reviewed those two in late December/early January, but Peridise was a little more elusive.

As you may or may not know in mid-January I moved to Seattle. Somehow, between packing up and actually getting here my Peridise went missing. How did this happen, you ask? I have no idea! I bought a couple cases from For Your Nymphomation to make the sex toy transportation easier, but somehow Peridise did not make it in to one. I keep expecting to find it laying around the house somewhere obvious that I’ve somehow overlooked, but it hasn’t happened by now so it probably isn’t going to happen.

After many searches through everything Onyx and I own I came to the conclusion that I was not going to find it. However, since I still needed to review it and I didn’t feel I had tried it out enough times to do a decent review (plus I wanted to play with it more) I went along to the Babeland store here and bought a replacement set. Since it was a toy I knew I would want to use multiple times I didn’t fret too much about that.

Now, back to the Peridise itself. I’ve explained my strange road to reviewing it, but what exactly is it, and why does it seem like they spelled paradise incorrectly?

Aneros is famous for their fantastic anal products, specifically prostate simulators, which are usually sleek and stylish made out of hard plastic and shaped to be a hands-free p-spot stimulator.

Peridise is actually a unisex anal PC (pubococcygeus) muscle exerciser. There are plenty of vaginal kegel exercisers out there which also focus on the PC muscles, but this is the first unisex exerciser and the first anal one that I know of.

PC muscle exercises are always talked about in relation to females, as they are most popular as vaginal kegel exercises as I already mentioned, but they can also be useful for men. In case you don’t know, the benefits of kegel exercises increase urinary or bowel control and can also increase control over ejaculation. Specifically for females they also increase tightness of the vagina, prevent pelvic prolapse, and can increase sexual arousal/desire. For males they can diminish premature ejaculation, encourage multiple orgasms (especially multiples without ejaculation), and result in a stronger erection. All good things, right?

The design of the Peridise is meant to stimulate the peristaltic reflex of the sphincter which is the reaction of the anus to contract when something is inserted in it. The idea behind that is that once the head of the Peridise is inserted the rest of it should be sucked up into the body automatically, and crazy enough that happens!

Peristaltic is also what Peridise gets it’s name from. Peristaltic + Paradise = Peridise. Kinda neat, right?

Peridise comes in two sets: beginner and advanced. Assumption would dictate that the advanced set would be larger than the beginner, but it’s actually the opposite. The theory being that the better control you has over the PC muscle the smaller the objects are that you would be able to successfully grasp. Makes, sense, right?

Both sets come with two plugs. The beginner set has two four inch plugs which are 22mm and 18mm thick (or 3/5″ and 4/5″). The advanced set has two 3 3/4″ plugs which are only slightly thinner at 20mm and 16mm (or 7/10″ and 9/10″). One thing I love about getting two in a set is that if you have a partner to share Peridise with (and you’re not having anal sex at the moment) both of you can be wearing a plug during sex, which would increase pleasure for both!

Taking Panthera Pardus’ advice I decided to insert both the LELO Luna Beads (kegel exercisers) and Peridise at the same time and delicious doesn’t begin to cover it!

Both exercisers are somewhat small, but them combined with the squeezing of muscles around them was absolutely heavenly! This could easily be done with Smart Balls or new Teneo Smart Balls as well, or any other vaginal balls assuming you have the required orifices.

But I digress. What you probably really want to know, aside from all this technical mumbo jumbo is if Peridise does all the things it claims to do, right? Well, I believe it does. I know it encourages stronger orgasm, as I’ve seen the difference in Onyx and I’ve felt the difference in myself. The PC muscle strengthening is slightly more difficult to assess, but I feel like it has assisted me there as well.

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